What's on Your Minds Wednesdays

You've heard my thoughts...now it's time to share yours! What's on Your Minds Wednesday is a chance for you to do just that--let me know what's on your minds!

What's on Your Minds Wednesdays

Now it's your turn to share! I want to hear what's on your minds!

Open Forum Wednesdays

Open Forum Wednesday is back! What is on your mind? Whether you've been on the receiving end of discrimination because of your beautiful dark skin, you've discriminated against someone because of their skin color, or if you were unaware that "color-struckness" was even an issue, I want to hear your story. Please share. Communication is the only way to stop this cycle.

The Willie Lynch Letter

Have you ever heard of the Willie Lynch Letter? I hadn't heard of it until I was around 35 years old. A portion of the letter is as follows. Let me know what you think. Is this an excuse for our continued ignorance against each other?

[Beginning of the Willie Lynch Letter]

 

Greetings,

Gentlemen I greet you here on the bank of the James River in the year of our Lord one thousand seven hundred and twelve. First, I shall thank you, the gentlemen of the Colony of Virginia, for bringing me here. I am here to help you solve some of your problems with slaves. Your invitation reached me on my modest plantation in the West Indies, where I have experimented with some of the newest, and still the oldest, methods for control of slaves. Ancient Rome would envy us if my program is implemented. As our boat sailed south on the James River, named for our illustrious King, whose version of the Bible we cherish, I saw enough to know that your problem is not unique. While Rome used cords of wood as crosses for standing human bodies along its highways in great numbers, you are here using the tree and the rope on occasions. I caught the whiff of a dead slave hanging from a tree, a couple miles back. You are not only losing valuable stock by hangings, you are having uprisings, and slaves are running away, your crops are sometimes left in the fields too long for maximum profit, you suffer occasional fires, and your animals are killed. Gentlemen, you know what your problems are; I do not need to elaborate. I am not here to enumerate your problems; I am here to introduce you to a method of solving them. In my bag here, I HAVE A FULL PROOF METHOD FOR CONTROLLING YOUR BLACK SLAVES. I guarantee every one of you that, if installed correctly, IT WILL CONTROL THE SLAVES FOR AT LEAST 300 HUNDREDS YEARS. My method is simple. Any member of your family or your overseer can use it. I HAVE OUTLINED A NUMBER OF DIFFERENCES AMONG THE SLAVES; AND I TAKE THESE DIFFERENCES AND MAKE THEM BIGGER. I USE FEAR, DISTRUST AND ENVY FOR CONTROL PURPOSES. These methods have worked on my modest plantation in the West Indies and it will work throughout the South. Take this simple little list of differences and think about them. On top of my list is “AGE,” but it’s there only because it starts with an “a.” The second is “COLOR” or shade. There is INTELLIGENCE, SIZE, SEX, SIZES OF PLANTATIONS, STATUS on plantations, ATTITUDE of owners, whether the slaves live in the valley, on a hill, East, West, North, South, have fine hair, course hair, or is tall or short. Now that you have a list of differences, I shall give you an outline of action, but before that, I shall assure you that DISTRUST IS STRONGER THAN TRUST AND ENVY STRONGER THAN ADULATION, RESPECT OR ADMIRATION. The Black slaves after receiving this indoctrination shall carry on and will become self-refueling and self-generating for HUNDREDS of years, maybe THOUSANDS. Don’t forget, you must pitch the OLD black male vs. the YOUNG black male, and the YOUNG black male against the OLD black male. You must use the DARK skin slaves vs. the LIGHT skin slaves, and the LIGHT skin slaves vs. the DARK skin slaves. You must use the FEMALE vs. the MALE, and the MALE vs. the FEMALE. You must also have white servants and overseers [who] distrust all Blacks. But it is NECESSARY THAT YOUR SLAVES TRUST AND DEPEND ON US. THEY MUST LOVE, RESPECT AND TRUST ONLY US. Gentlemen, these kits are your keys to control. Use them. Have your wives and children use them, never miss an opportunity. IF USED INTENSELY FOR ONE YEAR, THE SLAVES THEMSELVES WILL REMAIN PERPETUALLY DISTRUSTFUL. Thank you gentlemen.”

Open Forum Wednesdays

What's on your mind today?

Monday Madness Has Me Considering Tanning Beds

I'm referring to today as "Monday Madness," because of all the rain we are getting here in the Midwest. I remember how I used to hide from the sun—now I bask in it. Last week I mentioned I was on a cruise, but failed to mention the super dark tan I got while I was there. Well, now I am starting to peel and would not mind going to a tanning bed to regain that luscious deep bronze look I had. Would anyone of you go to a tanning salon, or have any of you ever been?

Open Forum Wednesdays

It's back! It's Open Forum Wednesday! Time to tell me what's on your mind. The only way we can unite and put an end to this issue once and for all is through communication...so let's get started today!

Enlightening Cruise

Hello Blog Readers,

I have been away on a much needed vacation. I took a seven-day cruise and visited many different places. It was interesting to sit back and watch different people on the ship and on the islands. I was with my husband and children, but was surprised to find that two black men continued to hit on me whenever they saw me alone. First off, I have to admit it was very flattering because they were indeed gorgeous and had perfect physiques to boot! I also have to admit that I was surprised to see that they were hitting on a few other sexy chocolate sisters I had seen on the ship. They seemed to be there with a family reunion group, though I didn't ask them too many questions, because I'm married and didn't want to show too much interest. During our brief conversation, we talked about my observations of Puerto Rico. I had not been there in 20 years and found there were many changes.

I loved the way the Puerto Rican people seemed to embrace everyone. They showed no distinction between darker or lighter people; everyone just seemed to show respect and love toward the tourists, as well as each other. I make it a point to closely observe this type of thing in different settings because it interests me so much. Also, I saw a lot of interracial couples on the ship, and most were black women with white men. This seems to be more and more prevalent than in the past. It was a very interesting cruise. 

I realize I have touched on several topics in this blog post. Let me know your thoughts on any topic I've brought up, and also let me know if you have cruised before and if you like it. Make this a great Monday!

Open Forum Wednesdays

It's Open Forum Wednesday! Time to speak your mind!!

Misconceptions Surrounding Slavery Perpetuated

I watched an interview of Terrence Howard on one of the late night programs, and he was talking about a house that he owns. The house apparently has a 300-ft. underground tunnel that leads into the woods, that slaves used as an escape route. He spoke about introducing the tunnel to his children, and she that he explained that it was the escape route for slaves. He asked them if they would like to possibly go in, and he stated, "They said, 'Why do we have to go in? We're light skinned. We can pass.'" He and the host laughed. 

I was thinking how inappropriate the comment was, because light-skinned people endured the hardships of slavery, just as the dark-skinned slaves did. It's this type of teaching that continues to encourage the ignorance in our community about the light-skinned, dark-skinned issue.

Open Forum Wednesdays

Tell me what's on your mind... What are your experiences? How has this issue impacted your life? Were you ever on the other end of the issue...being color struck yourself?

Does Light = Nice?

I was watching a comedian on HBO, and he made a statement I was a little confused by. He was saying a lot of raunchy stuff, then after saying it stated, "I bet the audience is thinking he's suppose to be nice; he's light skinned." Things got relatively quiet after he made the comment, a few chuckled, but most seemed baffled, like I was. Sometimes, I think this problem is bigger than I even thought, because of stupid statements like that. The comedian probably actually thinks he may appear a little less threatening because he has lighter skin. Can someone, anyone, shed some light on his comment?

Black Hollywood

Do you think there are enough dark-skinned actresses portrayed in Hollywood? Stupid question, I know. But what can we do to change that? What can we really do?

Brown Paper Bag Rule

Back in the early 1900s, the first black sorority, Alpha Kappa Alpha Inc., had a rule that if a potential candidate was darker than a brown paper bag, she would not be considered for the sorority. About a year ago, I overheard a member of this sorority make a statement about another member. She stated, "She was surprised she was able to get in, being she was EXTREMELY dark." I was taken back, but made no comment because the girl who made the statement is a close friend of the family. I pose the question, does this underlying inside racism still exist in the world of sororities and fraternities?

You're Pretty...For a Dark Girl

"You're so pretty to be dark"! 

How many times have I heard that oh, so tired statement coming from none other than who? "Black" people. Why can't I just be pretty? If it's meant to be a compliment, it's just the opposite—it's an insult. 

What do you think my people? Is it a compliment or an insult?

It's Our Right! Or Is It?

Hello all, sorry I missed posting a few blogs. I had been out a town for a minute. This week's blog poses the question "Is it our right"? 

Is it our right as African American women to voice a verbal or written opinion when we see brothers liking or loving only white women? This blog will usually focus on the trials and tribulations of growing up dark skinned, but I recently read another article about our boy Tiger Woods and I thought I would put the question out there. I have absolutely no problem with interracial marriages, because I am actually in one myself, but I do have a problem when it seems that certain people, and  black men in particular, only seem to entertain white women! 

I believe in loving whoever loves you back and whoever treats you well, but I will never accept that rationale from someone who seems to have never even attempted to date someone within their own race. Now what I am about to say will really get some people's blood boiling, but what the heck, I am gonna say it anyway! I can truly understand why black women date outside of their race, but find it hard to understand why black men won't make several attempts to stick within their race, before going to another. As I stated before, if you happen to just fall in love with someone outside of the black race, and it is clearly a match made in heaven, so be it. But when someone will only attempt to date outside of their race, then there is clearly a problem. 

So should we get our necks all tight over men like Tiger Woods, or should we not care?

Painful Names

I recently struck up a conversation with a beautiful sister on the bus I ride home, who is also a rich dark chocolate. We began to share stories of being called names like "grease monkey," "tar baby" and "blacky," just to name a few, by black boys growing up. We spoke about the pain it caused us, and the self esteem issues we both experienced. Her accuser, however, ended up asking her to the prom several years after the name calling started. She, of course, rejected his offer, which made me very happy to hear.

What do you all think about her rejection? Should she have gone to the prom with him?

Light Skinned vs. Dark Skinned

I would like to start my blog by discussing a party that was going to be held in the Columbus, Ohio, area, titled "Light Skinned vs. Dark Skinned." OMGosh and WTFreak! This is exactly what I am talking about. Why must we continue to perpetrate the ignorance on this subject matter? Did someone actually think this was something to bring us together as a people? If so they should have thought again. This just continues to divide and make the skin-color issue, an issue when it should not be.

Welcome to my blog!

Growing up as a brown-skinned African-American woman, I experienced hardship due to the color of my skin. Whether it be rude comments (intentional and unintentional) or outright discrimination, being made aware that black is beautiful…as long as it’s not too black, wore on my self-esteem as a young girl. While this issue seems to be prevalent amongst all ethnic races, it is especially common in the African-American community. The “color-struck” ideology has divided and destroyed communities and even families. Although it is prevalent, it is not often talked about, so those of us who are made to feel devalued because of the rich, beautiful, dark tone of our skin are forced to suffer in silence, and often feel like we are alone.

It’s time to break the silence—and that’s what “This Black On Me” is all about. I wish to share some of my personal experiences, as well as bring attention to the on-going struggle to break this cycle in our community.